Robbie Thomas
Stomach Agony and A Lot More
No, that person in the photo is not me, but I was in that position.
I have been dealing with stomach cramps on and off for the past two weeks. Some are minor, some are major. Some lead to me sitting on the toilet trying to shit and something comes out. Other times, nothing comes out.
Anyway, here is a nice story about stomach cramps in a public place. No, I didn’t shit myself (I couldn’t shit). It was Friday the 23rd and I was at the Motor City Rockers game. Before the game started, I had a shot of Barcadi with Sprite, followed by an Angry Orchard. Had a nice talk with a lovely dorky-looking Canadian woman and talked about Canadian shows like Trailer Park Boys and the defunct Flashpoint. A minute after the puck dropped, I had a sharp pain in my stomach. Luckily, I was near the men’s room and got my ass on the toilet. Nothing came out.
Five minutes later, the pain doesn’t go away, in fact, it gets worse. Run to the toilet again. And again, nothing comes out. I go back to my seat quivering in pain while I debate to take off at the ten-minute mark in the first period. I decided not to, despite the idea that it felt that was on my way to having an alien pop out of my stomach while I looked in horror. Anybody remember Species II? I imagine the two commentators doing the play-by-play.
“That’s a shot from Coash. And something is going on in the crowd there. A man wearing a blue bucket hat, his stomach has exploded and a monster is coming out of there. It seems this blue-hatted dork is conscious and aware that this is happening. He is screaming in horror and the fans around him are running away from that and screaming. I don’t blame them, I run from that shit too. The puck is in the Rockers’ zone…”
Sadly, the Rockers lost 8-0.
I went to Urgent Care and had to wait nearly two hours. I wasn’t the only one sick. Been losing some weight and they suggested to me to take it easy. Losing too much weight quickly can make you sick, or so it seems. Besides that, they didn’t say anything was seriously wrong.
Before this post ends, I have something unfavorable to say. I getting viciously sick of certain setbacks. Last week, I was hoping for a 50+ hour work week and to see more of those by the time my birthday shows up. Instead, I got 26 hours and we were done for the week. It appears we have a supplier issue. However, that made me fucking angry. I know my job and the whole world could give a shit and I understand why. But it would be a lot easier on me if I could make as much $$$ as I can by April/May. And it would be better without this bullshit that gets in the way, like hours cut because some motherfuckers ain’t doing their jobs right?
Yes, life is filled with setbacks, and unless you just sit on your ass and do nothing, you are going to deal with trouble while progressing in life. But, how many times in my life have I heard, “we have a problem here” when I progress? Or when something is supposed to happen that is beneficiary to me, but a wrench gets thrown in the fucking works? Why does so much bullshit happen while I try to reach my goals? I know this makes me sound like a paranoid fucking cunt, but this shit happens to me more than the average person. It fucking does! IT FUCKING DOES!!! I go to Craigslist and put an ad out for work wanted, and I get fucking scammers! I also applied for a part-time job, $12-15 an hour and they want a goddamn personality test. Are you fucking kidding me!?
I’m not asking for a fucking handout, just an opportunity. But why the motherfuck does it come with all these fucking hurdles? WHY!? Does shit have to be that fucking difficult!?